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What is a were-hamster?

December 5, 2008

If you are wondering why I am beating this joke to death, i found out my new meds are made from chinese hamster ovaries. Yeah really. I am injecting cute little hamster babies. My co worker was teasing me that stuffing your cheeks full of food and running on a tread mil were known side effects of these meds. This cracked me up so much I have been thinking and giggling about it all week.

It’s stuff like this that makes me appreciate my mom. We had a hard time when I was a loony teenager, but if she hadn’t raised to me to see the humor in all situations I would certainly be dead by now. From her dancing in the grocery store, to making me laugh so hard I got a chicken nugget stuck in my sinus, to sitting beside me in surgical recovery whispering “they cut off your UVULA” cackling madly and then refusing to tell me what the hell a uvula was.
She was there after my car accident, laying in my hospital bed with my ruined face. To add insult to injury I got a rash on my ass from the strong antibiotics used to prevent brain infection. A doc, trailing a crowd of residents, came in and didn’t acknowledge me as a human just started jerking up my gown and talking about me like I wasn’t there. Mom and I exchanged an evil look and I held down my gown and refused to let him look. He was finally forced to ask me if he “could see the affected area” And, with my mom smirking I asked- “what is the magic word?”
Horrified, he said Please and I said SURE and flipped over on the bed on my hands and knees hospital gown agape and presented him and the whole crowd my bare ass as my mom howled with laughter

These are the things that make stupid crap life throws at me bearable, and worth it. Because even if it sucks, it’s always good for making mama giggle.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. December 5, 2008 3:52 pm

    LOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!! OMG OMG! I don’t remember the ass rash!! I do however remember Quasimodo and the allergy shot. I remember you peeing in MY bed because we were laughing so hard (I think that’s when we were reading the astrology book and cackling about Pisces being passionately attached to small animals – I think I said something about a small animal hanging from a certain extremity). I remember wrestling you to the ground in front of Arby’s while the whole restaurant watched. I remember you running up to a woman in the Kmart parking lot who had just parked her Caddy in a handicapped spot, screaming “Praise the Lord, you’re healed!!!” I am in tears here!!!

  2. raandme permalink
    December 8, 2008 4:33 am

    I just found your blog and wanted to tell you that I think you’re a truly amazing person.

    I’ve loved everything youve written so far. I cant wait to read more.

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